So Easy to Love

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After all this time,

I’m still in love.

Several months.

Near-breakups.

Fights.

Mistakes, on both sides.

It hurts.

It hurts, but it doesn’t.

The pain–fades.

It’s easy, when you’ve

Figured out

How not to care.

How to let the memories

Fade

And be okay alone.

Be okay alone, when the one you

Love

Is with another.

 

It’s easy to love,

When you pretend

You no longer care.

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Without A Word

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Without a word,

I’ll run from you–

And leave you wondering

Why.

Why would I choose

To run

When you (say)

You try so hard.

Why would I run?

Why would I run

When you (seem to)

Work so hard?

As hard as you work,

As much as you try,

It doesn’t

Keep me

From running.

You hurt me.

You push me away,

Choose another,

And expect

Me

To stay.

A Long Dark Night

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It’s dark tonight.

Usually is, when I’m

Around you.

No, wait;

That was harsh,

Wasn’t it?

Well….I suppose

It’s about as harsh

As when you leave me

To do other things.

You never seem

To stick to the plans

You make with me.

You know, I wish

I could say these things.

There are many, many

Things I could say.

Things like:

“You’re forgiven.”

“You fool.”

“You seriously believed

“I meant it when I said

“It would be okay?”

So many words

That hide at the back

Of my throat–

Terrified

To be spoke.

I know they

Would wound–

Either him,

Or I.

Which one of us?

Beside the point.

I’m tired of pretending

That I’m willing to choose

Your joy

Over mine

Anymore.

It’s been far

Too many

Long dark nights

For me

To still

Care.

Good Old Love

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It’s hard. I can’t say

I enjoy it–

Waking up early

To make you breakfast.

Going to bed

Late

So we can game.

I can’t say

I’m used to it–

The small fights,

Disagreements.

I can’t say

I’m good at it–

Staying loyal,

Trying to impress.

I can’t say

I’m good at it,

But I still

Want to try.

I want to try.