A New Vow


Right now, I am working as hard as I can to lose weight. So, a bit about me–I was never thin. I was always curvy. Okay, okay–I was always edging into the realm of fat. I’m short, and currently weighing around 200 pounds. So, I’m not exactly healthy.

I hate it. Naturally, my darling boyfriend doesn’t care about my looks–he, in fact, likes me just how I am now. He’s said often that he thinks I shouldn’t worry about my looks whatsoever, but….I need to. I need to worry about my looks. I need to get thinner, and that’s a fact.

However, I’m in danger of causing myself bodily harm from doing this.

I need to figure out how to eat well, without starving myself. So, I need to count calories less and balance my workout load with my calorie intake.

However, this is going to be hard. I really don’t want to eat a lot anymore, but then that might turn into an eating disorder.

I don’t want to get that extreme.

I know my love wouldn’t allow me to do it, but then again, he doesn’t know everything I do about my weight loss right now. In fact, he isn’t going to find out about the diet pills my mom is going to get me to help me lose weight. I really am never going to tell him about that, because I am…I am pushing what I’m doing.

I’m scaring myself ever so slightly, and I’m getting worried I will just do myself harm.

So, that’s why I’m going to make myself a vow.

I’m not going to kill myself with this. I’m going to lose weight in a healthy fashion, by eating a good amount and remaining continually hydrated. I’m going to exercise–a few KM walk and an hour-long swim session of laps at the beach (or, seeing as I can’t feel my feet for blisters, two hour-long swim sessions). I’m going to be healthy.

I’m going to do this for me, and I’m going to get from 106 pounds to 180 pounds.

WITHOUT killing myself in the process.

This is the Half-Mad Writer, saying thanks for listening to my rambles.

I love you all.


3 thoughts on “A New Vow

  1. The key is to find something you actually enjoy doing – because that’s what you’re going to stick with. Build muscle – you’ll burn more fat that way. Remember that your physique is 30% exercise and 70% diet. Instead of telling yourself you’re not allowed to have things like sodas, sweets, fried foods, or carbs, make it a goal to take in MORE of the good stuff… drinking MORE water, eating MORE fresh fruits and vegetables, cooking MORE grilled, baked, steamed, or boiled foods. This post might help – it has an example of my weekly menu that has helped me lose the weight while still eating as much as I can stand. http://nickydoesblogilates.wordpress.com/2014/06/29/finishing-up-rejuneivate-calendar-and-eating-clean/

    Good Luck!


    • Thanks for sending me that link! It will actually help me focus more, especially knowing that I’ve got someone here on the blogosphere watching what I’m doing. That way, if my next post is “I messed up”, there’s a greater chance of someone knowing just how to kick my too-big butt back into shape 🙂 Good luck on your journey!


      • Have you tried Blogilates? It took me 7 years, countless “diets,” and who knows how many different workout programs before I finally found this, and it’s the only thing that has EVER worked for me. I definitely recommend giving it a try. You can do it from the privacy of your own home, it’s 100% Free, and it’s just 1 hour of your day (broken up in 4 or 5 mini-sessions so it doesn’t seem that long!) for up to 6 days a week. But it’s different every day so you don’t get a chance to get bored with it. Here is an example of one day’s workout if you’re interested in giving it a try. Do as much as you can, rest when you need to, use modifications if you need to… the more you keep at it, the stronger you’ll get and the more you’ll be able to do next time.


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